Pet Diary

For discussion of all general things. Keep it clean folks. No politics or religion.

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ConnerVT
Novice racer
Posts: 963
Joined: Wed Jan 18, 2012 8:01 pm
Country: USA
Suzuki 2-Strokes: T500R (now), T500M (40 yrs ago)
Location: North of Albany, NY

Pet Diary

Post by ConnerVT »

Dog Diary vs Cat Diary in USA

As seen in dog's diary:

8am - Oh Boy! Dog Food! My favorite!
9am - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
10am -Oh Boy! A walk! My favorite!
11am -Oh Boy! A car ride! My favorite!
Noon- Oh Boy! The kids! My favorite!
1pm - Oh Boy! The yard! My favorite!
3pm - Oh Boy! The kids! My favorite!
4pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
5pm - Oh boy! Mom! My favorite!
7pm - Oh boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
9pm - Oh boy! Sleeping in my master's bed! My favorite!

As seen in a cat's diary:

Day 183 in my captivity...

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.

They dine lavishly on fresh meat while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another house plant. Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded. Must try this at the top of the stairs.

In an attempt to disgust and repulse my vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair--must try this on their bed. Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of and to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmmm, not working according to plan.

There was some sort of meeting of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary during the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly, I heard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies". Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

I am convinced that the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand, has got to be an informant and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. However, I can wait. It is only a matter of time!
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Fritz500
To the on ramp
Posts: 495
Joined: Sat Jan 22, 2011 11:12 pm
Country: Australia
Suzuki 2-Strokes: Suzuki TS90, TS250, T500 (4), GT750
Location: Perth, Western Australia

Re: Pet Diary

Post by Fritz500 »

Dogs have masters
Cats have slaves
73 GT750 Ducati - 20%
72 T500J - 95%
09 Yam XVS950A
81 Yam XV920 - cafe conversion - 90%

“Anyone who believes a perpetual motion machine is impossible has no imagination; anyone who thinks it is possible has no education.” Adam Peenum
GT750Battleship
Road race school
Posts: 841
Joined: Tue Feb 19, 2013 2:45 am
Country: Australia
Suzuki 2-Strokes: Suzuki GT750A 1976
Location: Sydney New South Wales

Re: Pet Diary

Post by GT750Battleship »

:up: Hi,printed this out for the CAT LOVER up stairs,I've been in hiding all day,I thinks she wants to kill me, :twisted: very funny indeed,

Cheers,
GT750Battleship.
GT750Battleship.
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