Comedy Relief

Joiseygirl · Post by **Joiseygirl** » Wed Jan 09, 2013 5:49 pm

Good jokes are getting scarce. Why not try some riddles this year. I'll post the answer if you guys show some interest but guess incorrectly.

Riddle No. 1
What certain crime is punishable if attempted but not punishable if committed.

diamondj · Post by **diamondj** » Wed Jan 09, 2013 6:31 pm

Joiseygirl wrote:Good jokes are getting scarce. Why not try some riddles this year. I'll post the answer if you guys show some interest but guess incorrectly.

Riddle No. 1
What certain crime is punishable if attempted but not punishable if committed.

suicide?

diamondj · Post by **diamondj** » Wed Jan 09, 2013 6:35 pm

I am the beginning of the end, and the end of time and space. I am essential to creation, and I surround every place. What am I?

Joiseygirl · Post by **Joiseygirl** » Wed Jan 09, 2013 7:46 pm

I had heard this one before. The letter "E".

diamondj · Post by **diamondj** » Wed Jan 09, 2013 9:26 pm

The person who makes it, sells it. The person who buys it never uses it and the person who uses it doesn't know they are. What is it?

Joiseygirl · Post by **Joiseygirl** » Thu Jan 10, 2013 6:28 am

Tried to edit this with the correct riddle but was unable to. Oh well.

Try this one.
What English word retains the same pronunciation, even after you take away four of its five letters?

Fritz500 · Post by **Fritz500** » Thu Jan 10, 2013 8:57 am

For all riddles the answer is Google.

Joiseygirl · Post by **Joiseygirl** » Thu Jan 10, 2013 9:46 am

Fritz500 wrote:For all riddles the answer is Google.

Fritz, where I come from thats called cheating, come on now....use your gray mass!!!!

diamondj · Post by **diamondj** » Thu Jan 10, 2013 10:09 am

Joiseygirl wrote:
diamondj wrote:What certain crime is punishable if attempted but not punishable if committed.
I give up can't figure that one out.

Wasn't this the riddle you started this topic with - I guessed "suicide" as the answer...

Joiseygirl wrote:Try this one.
What English word retains the same pronunciation, even after you take away four of its five letters?

That's easy - Queue - although I've always felt that word had an extra "ue" in it!

How about this one:

The person who makes it, sells it. The person who buys it never uses it and the person who uses it doesn't know they are. What is it?

Jim

Joiseygirl · Post by **Joiseygirl** » Thu Jan 10, 2013 11:08 am

The person who makes it, sells it. The person who buys it never uses it and the person who uses it doesn't know they are. What is it?
Thats the one "I" couldn't figure out, but a co-worker told me that's an old one.... the answer is "Coffin"

(Ok, so I didn't use "my gray mass" I just used somebody elses...

Hey, at least I didn't use the internet.

GT750Battleship · Post by **GT750Battleship** » Wed Mar 06, 2013 5:15 am

Joiseygirl wrote:Good jokes are getting scarce. Why not try some riddles this year. I'll post the answer if you guys show some interest but guess incorrectly.

Riddle No. 1
What certain crime is punishable if attempted but not punishable if committed.

Starts with S....ends with E!
How am I going so far.....

Cheers,
GT750Battleship.

djfisher22 · Post by **djfisher22** » Wed Mar 06, 2013 7:33 am

What's the difference between an epileptic oyster shucker and a prostitute with diarrhea?

djfisher22 · Post by **djfisher22** » Wed Mar 06, 2013 7:36 am

Q: What's the difference between a tribe of pygmies and a woman's track team?

djfisher22 · Post by **djfisher22** » Wed Mar 06, 2013 7:37 am

A: An epileptic oyster shucker shucks between fits.

A: A tribe of pigmy's is a cunning bunch of runts.

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