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Engineers' Conversion Table

Posted: Fri Apr 22, 2011 9:41 am
by tz375
Another email I got recently. Some are better than others.

1. Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter = Eskimo Pi

2. 2000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton

3. 1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 microscope

4. Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement = 1 bananosecond

5. Weight an evangelist carries with God = 1 billigram

6. Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour = Knotfurlong

7. 16.5 feet in theTwilight Zone = 1 Rod Serling

8. Half of a large intestine = 1 semicolon

9. 1,000,000 aches = 1 megahurtz

10. Basic unit of laryngitis = 1 hoarsepower

11. Shortest distance between two jokes = A straight line

12. 453.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake

13. 1 million-million microphones = 1 megaphone

14. 2 million bicycles = 2 megacycles

15. 365.25 days = 1 unicycle

16. 2000 mockingbirds = 2 kilomockingbirds

17. 52 cards = 1 decacards

18. 1 kilogram of falling figs = 1 FigNewton

19. 1000 milliliters of wet socks = 1 literhosen

20. 1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche

21.. 1 trillion pins = 1 terrapin

22. 10 rations = 1 decoration

23. 100 rations = 1 C-ration

24. 2 monograms = 1 diagram

25. 4 nickels = 2 paradigms

26. 2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital = 1 IV League

27. 100 Senators = Not 1 decision

Re: Engineers' Conversion Table

Posted: Fri Apr 22, 2011 9:47 pm
by Joiseygirl
:D :D :D

Re: Engineers' Conversion Table

Posted: Mon Apr 25, 2011 7:24 am
by sfront
#25 is incorrect............ :roll:
But I love the rest of them! :up:

Re: Engineers' Conversion Table

Posted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 4:18 am
by Fritz500
I use these when working on the bike. I can't recall the metric conversions...


A tad = half a pube
A pube = 1.2 cu%t hairs
Cu%t hair = 2 smidgeons
Smidgeon = 4 bee’s dicks
Bee’s dick = 3 poofteenths
Poofteenth = less than SFA

Re: Engineers' Conversion Table

Posted: Wed Apr 27, 2011 11:09 am
by H2RICK
:lol: :lol:
Thanks for that, TZ.
I actually know at least TWO engineers that might laugh at your list.....
but they're shunned by all other engineers. :lol: :lol:

Re: Engineers' Conversion Table

Posted: Thu Apr 28, 2011 8:39 pm
by two-stroke-brit
my favorite engineer joke.

<embed src="http://p.webshots.com/flash/smallplayer ... 26source=v" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350" quality="best" allowscriptaccess="always"></embed><br/><br/><a href="http://good-times.webshots.com/video/30 ... ack.mpg</a>

enjoy.
mark

Re: Engineers' Conversion Table

Posted: Thu Apr 28, 2011 8:40 pm
by two-stroke-brit
dont think i did that right :oops: