It's true, of course ...

[Digger]

An elderly Scottish Jewish guy decided to take it a little easier and take up golf, so he put his name down for membership at the local club. After a week he received a message that his application had been turned down. So he went to the club to inquire why.

Secretary: You are aware that this is a Scottish golf club?
Scot: Aye but I am as Scottish as you are Jock.
Secretary: This means that on formal occasions we wear kilts.
Scot: Aye, so do I.
Secretary: You are aware that we wear nothing under our kilts?
Scot: Aye, neither do I.
Secretary: But you are Jewish?
Scot: Aye, I be that.
Secretary: So you are circumcised?
Scot: Aye, I be that too.
Secretary: I am terribly sorry, but the members just would not feel comfortable with that.

Scot: Ach, away with yah man. I know that you have to be a Protestant to march with the Orangemen, and I know that you have to be a Catholic to become a Knight of Saint Columbus, but this is the first time that I have heard, that you have to be a complete prick to join a golf club!