Who said footballers aren't intelligent?

[johnakay]

Who said footballers aren't intelligent?

"My parents have always been there for me, ever since I was about 7. "
David Beckham

"I would not be bothered if we lost every game as long as we won theLeague."
Mark Viduka

"Alex Ferguson is the best manager I've ever had at this level. Well,he's the only manager I've actually had at this level. But he's the bestmanager I've ever had."
David Beckham

"If you don't believe you can win, there is no point in getting out ofbed at the end of the day."
Neville Southall

"I've had 14 bookings this season - 8 of which were my fault, but 7 ofwhich were disputable."
Paul Gascoigne

"I've never wanted to leave. I'm here for the rest of my life, andhopefully after that as well."
Alan Shearer

"I'd like to play for an Italian club, like Barcelona "
Mark Draper

"You've got to believe that you're going to win, and I believe we'll win the World Cup until the final whistle blows and we're knocked out."
Peter Shilton

"I faxed a transfer request to the club at the beginning of the week,but let me state that I don't want to leave Leicester "
Stan Collymore

"I was watching the Blackburn game on TV on Sunday when it flashed on the screen that George (Ndah) had scored in the first minute at Birmingham . My first reaction was to ring him up. Then I remembered he was out there playing."
Ade Akinbiyi

"Without being too harsh on David Beckham, he cost us the match."
Ian Wright

"I'm as happy as I can be - but I have been happier."
Ugo Ehiogu

" Leeds is a great club and it's been my home for years, even though I live in Middlesborough."
Jonathan Woodgate

"I can see the carrot at the end of the tunnel."
Stuart Pearce

"I took a whack on my left ankle, but something told me it was my right."
Lee Hendrie

"I couldn't settle in Italy - it was like living in a foreign country."
Ian Rush

" Germany are a very difficult team to play...they had 11 internationals out there today."
Steve Lomas

"I always used to put my right boot on first, and then obviously my right sock."
Barry Venison

"I definitely want Brooklyn to be christened, but I don't know into what religion yet."
David Beckham

"The Brazilians were South American, and the Ukrainians will be moreEuropean."
Phil Neville

"All that remains is for a few dots and commas to be crossed."
Mitchell Thomas

"One accusation you can't throw at me is that I've always done my best."
Alan Shearer

"I'd rather play in front of a full house than an empty crowd."
Johnny Giles

"Sometimes in football you have to score goals."
Thierry Henry

[titan performance]

At a recent training session with Beckham and co, one of David's colleagues takes a tumble and injures his ankle. Sitting on the ground rubbing the ankle, the trainer runs on the pitch with a bucket and sponge to assist, and David comes over to see what's wrong. After a minute or two of massage and wet sponge treatment, the pain is still just as bad, so the the trainer says, "I'm going to give you a cortisone injection"........................."hang on, hang on", says Dave, "I injured my ankle last week, and you didn't give me a car !"


....................................


It was David's birthday recently, and Victoria was struggling knowing what to buy the man who has everything. She was wandering aimlessly through the aisles of a department store looking for inspiration, when the assistant found her staring blankly at the vaccuum flasks.
"What are these silver fings?", she asked, when he approached.
"They are vaccuum flasks madam, they keep hot things hot, and cold things cold".
"Wow, really?...I'll take the biggest and best one please".
Later that week on the morning of his birthday, Dave ripped off the wrapping of his new vaccuum flask. Once opened, he looked blankly at it, and asked, "what is it Vic?"
"It' a vaccuum flask silly, it keeps hot fings hot, and cold fings cold".
"Oh ok, fanks..."

At training a few days later, the lads were getting ready to go out on the pitch, when one of his colleagues spots the flask in Dave's bag...."what you got there, Dave?"
"Oh, it's my vaccuum flask, it keeps hot fings hot, and cold fings cold." replies David.
"Ok, what you got in it mate?"....
"I got tomato soup......oh, and an ice lolly for half time !"